I used to have nothing to
say about New Year other than big hopes. Last year, I put on a big hope, big
dreams, made a rough timeline. I pin point love, life, and career. See what
happens afterwards..
Love –
After a steady start in 2011, it turns upside down in 2012. And it ended. I
could have a drilled down list of my disappointment, but I do realized that I’m
far from perfect. Ditching the list, all I can say is that I’m not sure where
we’re going from this point. Was he going to be the best partner? Or –as
Vanya once said- ‘the least tolerable’ weaknesses? After a year relationship, I
still can’t answer those questions. I learn a lot, and quite surprise that I’m
doing very fine. I thought I’d be healing up slowly but the fact is, days
passed and all is well. We still have a good relationship for I don’t know how
long. Since it ended, love no longer in my priority.
Career
– With promising career at the beginning, in Q2 all the hopes are gone. The
plan that was earlier made to join the international work force was failed to
come true, as the government’s legal don’t grant me a working permit. Then I
spent the rest of the year worrying about my career. Where would I go? What
other options I that have? Up until October, where the big choice has to be
made. Stay in the company and take their offer – which is a new thing, meaning
that I will have to learn about it again from the very beginning, at this age.
Or, to leave the company with only God knows what will happen next. Which one
did I choose? The risky one, of course. A very bold move, or an irrelevant
decision? You tell me. I know I should be thankful to God when a month later, I
got the job that I always dreamed of. This analyst league, I’m on it now. I could
say I got few hands from good friends, which are extended hands of God. I’m
reaching the light at the end of the tunnel. A new start, a new beginning, an
open wide opportunity to improve myself. Crossing fingers wishing everything
turn out to great next year.
Life –
Above and beyond, life has always been fantastic. In my troubled times
regarding my career, I was forced to face it on my own (and God of course)
without any support from my special one (at that time). As for him, his mother
passed away. I admit that things are quite messy on both sides. One thing I
learned –through the hard way-: being insecure about career -this is very true
and you really got to trust me-, it feels worse than being insecure about your
relationship. On the other hand, I met new friends. These girls brighten up my
life. We’re just a bunch of professionals from different industries who are not
into office politics, and tired of dramas. So when you said ‘Sex and the City’
is just a fiction, we resemble the mediocre reality of the series with
Coffeewar (a local coffee shop) instead of fancy restaurants, cigs instead of
gyms. My neighborhood friends find their own problems in their neck, so we
didn’t see each other as much but still manage to communicate. So although most
aren’t as planned in 2012, I could say it’s all within tolerance level. Oh! I
did skipped Sting’s concert this year, which adds up to my ‘lifetime regret for
not going to these concerts’ list. Ugh.
